'Tis the season: Christmas songs are climbing the charts

A real-life mishmash of different Team Rocket wannabes is having a lot more success thieving “Pokémon” cards than Jessie and James ever did in their attempts to pilfer Pikachu throughout the anime series.

The Washington Post reports on a string of DC-area heists of “Pokémon” cards, with CGC Cards Vice President Matt Quinn quoted as saying, “Any time you’re carrying around collectibles that are worth money, whether it be gold bars, Pokémon cards, coins, toy trains, or whatever it might be, you have to be vigilant with knowing that you’re carrying collectibles that can be easily stolen from you,” adding that these episodes are happening across the country.

Gotta thieve ’em all is an outgrowth of the massive boom in the value of “Pokémon” cards, with The Wall Street Journal reporting on 3,000% returns earlier this year. Their meteoric rise has been a big boon to GameStop, whose collectibles business has played a critical role in the stabilization and nascent turnaround of its operations.

Both individual cards and unopened packs have been targeted in robberies of stores and personal residences, per the Post report.

Stealing unopened packs of “Pokémon” cards is effectively thieving and buying call options at the same time: an individual pack might not be worth much on its own, but the most valuable cards in the recently released Mega Evolutions set are going for over $1,000. And at about 23 grams per pack and relative differences in security, the logistics seem a lot less onerous than trying to rob a gold dealer.

(Note: I don’t know for sure. I’m not a thief, besides that Klondike bar one time in high school.)